This article (is on stimulus/response and needs) and a few articles are about the golden opportunity we have for learning, change growth, development and transformation. Moving from a caterpillar to being in a cocoon to become a butterfly. They blend ideas and snippets on needs, mindsets, zones and actions from Stephen Covey, Tony Robbins, Abraham Maslow, Carol Dweck, Nelson Mandela, Robin Sharma, Forrest Gump and a few others.
STIMULUS AND RESPONSE
In living our life things happen, sometimes good, sometimes bad, that is based on our perception. The bottom line is IT HAPPENS.
Stephen Covey shares how one of the most profound and truly life changing experiences of his life - one conceptually fundamental to his work on the 7 Habits was when in a meditative and reflective state he read the following three sentences in a book.
BETWEEN STIMULUS AND RESPONSE THERE IS A SPACE.
IN THAT SPACE LIES OUR FREEDOM AND POWER TO CHOOSE OUR RESPONSE.
IN THOSE CHOICES LIES OUR GROWTH AND OUR HAPPINESS.
When we have a stimulus be that a situation, challenge, confrontation, opportunity, conversation or an interaction we often respond or more accurately sometimes react with a reflex action. That may be harsh words, anger, compassion, love, violence in our thoughts, words and actions. We often react as opposed to choosing a response. With practice, reflection, awareness and effort we can choose our response. We can learn and grow to habitualise a more empowering response.
For many of us the current stimulus is the pandemic, Covid-19, the lock down. What is our response? How do we choose respond or did we react?
NEEDS
THE 6 HUMAN NEEDS
In the TED Talk by Tony Robbins, Peak Performance Coach, on Why we do what we do he shares the 6 humans needs. 4 are related to Personality and 2 to Spirit. These needs drive our behaviour. We can have these 6 needs but one is likely to be more dominant. The 6 Human needs are depicted in the image below.
Tony shares about the difference between lack of resources and being resourceful. He shares 3 questions to ask ourselves to be more resourceful:
What are you going to focus on?
What does it mean?
What are you going to do?
MASLOWS HIERACHY OF NEEDS : DEFICIENCY AND GROWTH
Many of the 6 Human Needs shared by Tony correlate with Abraham Maslow’s Heirachy of Needs.
In the journal Scientific American, an article by Scott Barry Kaufman titled: Beautiful Minds: Choose Growth shares how the needs can be grouped into 2 main classes which must be integrated for wholeness:
Deficiency/Defense Needs - often related to fears, anxieties
Growth Needs - more related to acceptance and love
4 DIMENSIONS OF A HUMAN
These again map onto the 4 Dimensions of a Human I have referred to in previous articles:
Physical,
Mental,
Social/Emotional and
Spiritual
Covey shares that these map onto the needs to : to Live, to Love, to Learn and to leave a Legacy.
Robin Sharma refers to these as the 4 Interior Empires : MindSet, HeartSet, HealthSet and SoulSet.
We look after these needs, develop ourselves in the different needs then we live a meaningful, fulfilling, happy life. If one or more is missing or not looked after we have disconnect, discontentment and feel unfulfilled and out of balance.
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Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good; supporting the UNs Sustainable Development Goals. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.