In the story of Jesus’ birth there are three kings who come bearing gifts. In Charles Dickens’ The Christmas Carol there are 4 ghosts who visit Ebeneezer Scrooge. His business partner Jacob Marley and the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future.

On 11th Dec 2020 our world changed when my father suddenly passed (https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/news/2020/12/24/live-love-learn-amp-legacy) away within 36 hours. He was the primary carer for my mum. We had the gifts and ghosts of : Old age, Grief, Loneliness, Parkinsons and Dementia. That was part of our inheritance.

Without those gifts and ghosts this article would not be written, published and shared.

As time goes by the probability that someone close to you will be impacted by dementia is increasing. 

“One of the hardest things in life is to know that you can not stop the decline as you witness firsthand the diminishing cognitive capacity of a loved one due to progressive incurable neurological conditions such as Parkinson’s or Dementia. 

To observe them becoming a shadow of themselves day by day; the impact on their physical, mental, emotional, social and spiritual wellbeing. Knowing there is nothing you can do to stop that decline. Experiencing the loss each day as anticipatory grief.” 

Shaileen Shah - Carer, Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker and Trainer.

This article is about my role as a carer for my mum who is elderly, grieving, lonely and suffering from the progressive and incurable neurological conditions of both Parkinson’s and Dementia. It shares the perspective of the carer, the challenges faced, how best to look after yourself as well as how to look after and interact with someone who has these conditions or someone you are caring for. 

I salute all those who are carers of any type and ask you to support those who you know who are doing a caring role.